Happiness is a habit - or are we hard-wired for happiness?

Sometimes it’s difficult to pin-point exactly what meditation does for us. We know it’s good for us. We might read all about the conclusive evidence in mindfulness articles or books. But if someone asked you at this very moment to explain in detail how meditation or yoga practice benefits you personally, would you know exactly, or would you have to stop and give it some thought?

During the December holidays, things transpired in such a way that I got caught up in various tasks. I also forgot to pack in my meditation bench. Anyway, to condense a long story: I simply didn’t have the energy to add yoga asana to my physically challenging days, and my meditation practice dwindled to nothing at the same time.

“How interesting!”, I thought, after week 1. I wonder what would happen if I don’t meditate or practice yoga for the whole holiday? So, partly as an experiment, and to some extent because I felt lazy and liberated by the lack of routine and no schedule to adhere to, I set the intention to make no effort whatsoever to engage in yoga asana or a formal sitting meditation practice for the entire holiday. I didn’t think it would make much difference. I mean, why not be lazy on holiday? Holidays are meant to be for lazing around, after all.

Well, I’ll tell you why: This is what I learnt when I stopped meditation & yoga for 1 month:

Bad Eating:

I started eating junk food almost immediately. Granted, I don't need much encouragement. I love food. :) And, yes, it was Christmas – and the time of year for puddings, chocolates and festivities, after all. But it was also because I was without a regular movement practice. I thought I’d do a bit more gardening or walking instead, but then it got a bit hot, so I skipped a day. And another. And it's not so much fun to walk alone, so I skipped the next day. By week 4 I really knew it!

Not as Flexible:

I started to feel a bit of stiffness in my joints. Some movements became just a teensy bit uncomfortable. Definitely from lack of movement. Something I struggle with anyway is stiff joints. (I know, as a yoga teacher, that’s kind of funny, right?) Apparently a reduction in estrogen can cause muscle function reduction and stiffness in women "after a certain age". (The "M" word.) I know from experience a regular yoga practice helps keep that particular symptom at bay entirely.

Up-and-down:

Talking about estrogen: my hormones got a bit confused and fuddled. Our endocrine system is sensitive to changes in environment. Exercise, stress and relaxation influences the functioning of our endocrine system. While I’m not saying yoga and meditation is the “be all and end all” I do know from experience that my yoga & meditation practice supports the healthy functioning of my endocrine system, reducing hormone related symptom like PMS, hot flushes, etc.

Less Energy:

My energy levels were lower after week 2. I felt slightly less energetic waking up, and generally felt less energetic during the day. I'm not saying we must rush around on holiday, but this feeling was less to do with feeling lazy and putting my feet up. It was a lack of energy. By week 3, I became tired earlier in the evening, but not necessarily sleeping as soundly as before. So it becomes a circle.

Feeling Slightly Off-kilter:

Any regular contemplative practice, not necessarily meditation only, provides a restful feeling of balance. It makes me feel as if I’m really connecting with my world. By week 4 there was certainly an underlying feeling of something missing, some essential ingredient. That feeling of well-being wasn’t quite as much there.

Ratty and Snappy:

Sounds like the name of a cartoon :)

But the worst for me – and quite embarrassing - was feeling impatient and short-tempered much quicker. I value my close relationships. It’s important to me to be kind, courteous, patient & understanding to people I love. Well, to everyone actually, but particularly to people I love. So to find myself feeling ratty and snappy was unsettling. I didn’t like that. At. All

So now that it sounds like my life fell apart totally - LOL - what this experiment actually started me thinking about is the question of what we are by nature. If cutting out yoga and meditation for a few weeks makes me feel less happy, does that mean I am - or we are - by nature not happy? Are our brains hard-wired to be happy? Or has evolution hard-wired our brains to worry and keep us unhappy?

This is what I discovered:

It is generally agreed that our brain is hard-wired to detect danger. Its what kept our ancestors alive. A bit of anxiety and paranoia is quite useful when you’re living with sabre-toothed tigers in the bushes. This ability to detect and remember potentially dangerous or negative situations is something neuroscientists call Negative Bias. It means the brain is better at seeing and storing negative information or experiences than positive. When times are good, we don’t feel that in the same way as when things go badly: we feel that deeply.

In modern society, where we are largely safe from life or death situations, our brain still pays more attention to the negative. What this means is an estimated 75 to 80 percent of our subconscious self-talk processed in our mind is negative.

So does this mean our brain is hard-wired for worry and unhappiness? Until recently there havent been many studies on positive emotions because they are so subjective. But the latest research suggests that we are born with a certain percentage of innate happiness, with some people born with “sunnier” disposition than others. But the research shows that the balance of our happiness is … a habit. This means we can counteract our negative bias and train our brain to be happier.

Our experiences shape our brain, and as we move through life, experiences spark certain brain circuits, and those that are used most often become hard-wired, creating a neural pathway. Neural pathways that are used more often are easier to activate. In this way, patterns emerge and the patterns that are practiced become quite literally, the path of least resistance.

It has been discovered that we can change our neural pathways, but it takes deliberate action, a definite setting of intention to rewire our brain to become happier. It is a little more difficult to become happier, more positive people because negative events will automatically register in our consciousness. We are made that way. (Remember the sabre-tooth tiger) But positive experiences need a little more effort. As I researched this, I came across a description: “Positive experiences need to be ushered in, invited to sit down and stay.”

In other words, we have to create the habit of happiness. Buddhists say that happiness & sorrow are our own responsibility and completely within our control. Since everything comes from the mind, and we are responsible for our own mind, we decide wehther to be happy or unhappy. It is not the external circumstance which creates happiness or worry. It’s our own attitude, our own mind, set by our own intention.

The practice of Gratitude is an incredible practice to help spark a happier brain.

I also read somewhere – I’m not sure where - sorry, I’m not always very good at remembering where I picked things up….

“Research has shown that through deliberate practice and skill building we can actually change the structure and nervous system of the brain to create more emotional resilience and happier life.

It’s kind of like riding a bike. I dare you to try and forget how to ride a bike. You can’t do it. It’s because this skill has been hardwired into our brains. It’s called implicit memory. Learning how to ride a bike takes effort and practice until it became second nature.”

So … Happiness is a habit.

Thank you for a lovely first sitting of 2020.

Mxx